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Swinging Lifestyle Contact Etiquette

As many of you are new to the swinging lifestyle, it has been suggested that perhaps some guidance on the etiquette around writing a contact ad, and how to respond to a contact ad would be useful. Most of this comes down to using good manners that we should all be using every day, just not in the swinging lifestyle.


  • Make your ad informative, explain what you are looking for and who you are not interested in. If you write a short general profile along the lines of "We are here to have fun and meet new people" you will get replies from people who will not meet your requirements. Have a look at our ad by clicking here, we have been meeting people for years, so we have refined our ad to make sure we get reponses from the kind of people we are interested in. If people who do not meet our criteria write, they should not expect a response. 
  • Please respond to all e-mails you receive from respondents, unless they have completely disregarded what you wrote in your ad.
  • Most of them will have spent time plucking up courage to write to you, and time thinking of the right thing to say to get you to notice them.
  • It does not need to be a long letter, a short note saying something along the lines of "Thank you for your response, but you do not match what I am currently looking for, better luck next time" will at least let the respondent know they have failed. I know that I for one check my mail eagerly after I send every response, hoping that someone has written back to me.
  • If you are an escort advertising for business please advertise only in the escort section. If you are an escort advertising for play friends please use a different e-mail address from that used for your business. If I am made aware of people being asked for payment when responding to ads outside the escort area I will delete the ad.


  • Always be polite.
  • Tell the advertiser what you like about their ad.
  • Tell them how you think you will meet their requirements.
  • If you enclose a picture show your face - most people like to see the person, rather than a piece of genitalia. If they like the look of you, they will then ask for another picture, a nude one if they want it. (some people do want nude pictures from the start, but they will usually say so in their ad).
  • Keep the language clean, match your response to the ad. Don't go straight in with a hardcore letter.
  • If you are turned down by an advertiser, don't keep contacting them - you are not going to make any friends by being a nuisance or abusive. Just move on to the next advertiser.

I am sure that I have missed many points, if you can think of any extra points drop me a line and I will update the pages.